those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
