I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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