i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
