Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Randomize
