you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize