Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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