They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
