google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
