CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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