are you so shy because you have an std?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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