the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
