sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I feel like death gave me a hand job
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
