hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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