He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
