Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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