good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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