Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize