yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Randomize
