"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
