4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
