I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize