You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
