Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
