What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Randomize