There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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