when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
