There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
