it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
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