no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
this is an emotional support booty call
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
