oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
