I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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