I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
