I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
