so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
