Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
