You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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