you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
