This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
