I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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