dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize