She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Randomize
