He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
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