Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
