I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
