i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
