Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
