vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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