apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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