She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
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