i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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