You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
