Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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